"Conscious Discipline offers a relationship-based community model of classroom management. The key is a sense of community. The 'school family' is the core of the program. The school family is held together through communication skills. These skills are taught during conflict moments in the classroom and through active learning lessons. The goal of the school family is to create problem solvers." - Conscious Discipline by Becky Bailey
Why is a School Family Important?
Creating a school family is all about making connections - connections between families and teachers, teachers and students, and students and students. These connections are created through routines, rituals and structures and they help to provide three essential ingredients for school success:
A willingness to learn: Without willingness, each interaction becomes a power struggle instead of a learning opportunity. The School Family brings all children, especially the most difficult, to a place of willingness through a sense of belonging.
Impulse control: Connection with others is the construct that literally wires the brain for impulse control. Disconnected children are disruptive and prone to aggressive or bullying behaviors. External reward/punishment systems cannot improve a child’s ability to self-regulate because they are not designed to teach new skills. The School Family uses connection to encourage impulse control while teaching self-regulation skills in context.
Attention: Our attentional system is sensitive to stress and becomes engaged with positive emotions. The School Family reduces stress while creating an atmosphere of caring, encouragement and meaningful contributions. These components are essential for children to develop and apply sustained attention.
-from consciousdiscipline.com
A willingness to learn: Without willingness, each interaction becomes a power struggle instead of a learning opportunity. The School Family brings all children, especially the most difficult, to a place of willingness through a sense of belonging.
Impulse control: Connection with others is the construct that literally wires the brain for impulse control. Disconnected children are disruptive and prone to aggressive or bullying behaviors. External reward/punishment systems cannot improve a child’s ability to self-regulate because they are not designed to teach new skills. The School Family uses connection to encourage impulse control while teaching self-regulation skills in context.
Attention: Our attentional system is sensitive to stress and becomes engaged with positive emotions. The School Family reduces stress while creating an atmosphere of caring, encouragement and meaningful contributions. These components are essential for children to develop and apply sustained attention.
-from consciousdiscipline.com
Creating Our Own School Family
Our Mission
Learning About the Brain
Prefrontal Lobes: Executive State
Limbic System: Emotional State
Brain Stem: Survival State
Our Safe Place
The safe place provides the opportunity for children to remove themselves from the group in order to become calm, regain composure and/or maintain control when upset, angry or frustrated.
Adios Greetings
EVERYDAY we say goodbye to each other with either a hug, high five, fist bump or handshake! It is a GREAT way to end our day as a school family!
I-Messages
•I feel . . . (describe one or two feelings: hurt, angry, sad)
•When people . . . (what happened: When people ignore me. When people disrespect me)
•I need . . . (what do you need? I need respect. I need to be included)
•Will you . . . (ask for what you want: Will you help me next time? Will you include me?)
The “I” Message is used when you need or want to say something to someone but you don’t know how to say it. It could be used when a friend hurts your feelings or when you’re feeling angry or sad. An “I” Message is used when you want the other person to really hear you.
•When people . . . (what happened: When people ignore me. When people disrespect me)
•I need . . . (what do you need? I need respect. I need to be included)
•Will you . . . (ask for what you want: Will you help me next time? Will you include me?)
The “I” Message is used when you need or want to say something to someone but you don’t know how to say it. It could be used when a friend hurts your feelings or when you’re feeling angry or sad. An “I” Message is used when you want the other person to really hear you.
Clean Ups
•I know that I . . . (describe what you did: I know I hurt your feelings.)
•I apologize.
•What can I do to make it right? (let the person tell you what he/she needs)
•Next time I will . . . (repeat back what the person needs if you agree)
•Will you forgive me?
The “Clean Up” is used when you need or want to apologize to someone and you don’t know what to say. It could be when you hurt someone’s feelings or when you did something you knew you weren’t supposed to do. We all make mistakes and messes - this tool helps to clean them up.
•I apologize.
•What can I do to make it right? (let the person tell you what he/she needs)
•Next time I will . . . (repeat back what the person needs if you agree)
•Will you forgive me?
The “Clean Up” is used when you need or want to apologize to someone and you don’t know what to say. It could be when you hurt someone’s feelings or when you did something you knew you weren’t supposed to do. We all make mistakes and messes - this tool helps to clean them up.